Sunday Laredo

Time to crack open what I hope will be the equivalent of the Sunday New York Times for my readers...the SUNDAY LAREDO TIMES. News stories? I'll leave that up to Cnn.Com, but we are going to have everything else. A great sports section, with lead pipe lock picks for the NFL. Arts and Entertainment? Got it. Crossword? Got that, too. Just like when I opened the paper before my father woke up, and got smacked, it's time to dive into the Laredo Times for October 12, 2008...

Arts and Entertainment Section

Here is my review for Entourage. It sucks. Vinny Chase never made that show, and I could care less if his character ended up on a second rate sitcom, like Entourage. Johnny Drama should be spun off into one of HBO's other shitty dramas, or they should make that Five Towns show into a real show. Eric is short and annoying, and I'm pissed he had that threesome with those two hot chicks in season whatever it was. Turtle provides comedy relief and that's all they ask of him, which is cool. Ari has his spots where he's hilarious, but I'd rather see more of his wife...without him...or those snot-nosed kids. The plot is recycled to the point where the best thing would be to have somebody killed off. I nominate Eric. I mean, in cheezy sitcoms there was always one episode where something really bad happened to somebody. I'm pretty sure ALF ate Lucky one time, and Sam was kidnapped that one time in Diff'rent Strokes. Something needs to happen.

Movies Section

White Men Can't Jump is on On Demand. Watch it 20 times. I have actually noticed there are a ton of Wesley Snipes movies on. Watch 'em all. Great month of programming! Cable gets two thumbs up!

Business Section

Business in the world is shitty. But my fantasy team is taking care of business. Kurt Warner Larry Fitzgerald, Eli, Matt Forte, Stephen Jackson...I had a great draft. I know, proof is in the pudding, so check out my squad, and basque in greatness.

Underwear Ads

What boy didn't go through the newspaper and stop at the department store ad, and look at the women in the (grandma) underwear ads? I would look at them longer than the NL East standings. Well the Laredo Times are the same:















I had to bring this one back...

but that's not an ad, is it?






Sports

Whoa...9:50 AM...Need Picks

Chicago (-2.5) at Atlanta (43)

The Bears will stuff the run. Matt Ryan is going to throw picks. Chicago and the over.

Cowboys (-4.5) at Arizona (52)

Cowboys defense is garbage. Romo drops the ball a ton. Crayton drops the ball a ton. Cards...no sacks, no picks last week. Cards (and my fantasy team) rolls. Zona and the over.

Miami (+3) at Houston (45)

As long as Ron Artest is within the Houston city metro area, I like Houston. If you see an unknown wearing #96, and he's running around with a Dolphins helmet in his hand (with the head still in it) you'll know what I mean. Houston and the under.

Super Sloppy Underdog Pick

St. Louis (+12.5) at Washington (44)

Washington has the ugliest uni's and if you think their game is pretty, you don't know Redskin football. They win but don't cover...take the under as well, in a sweater.

Enjoy the day...next week I'll have a crossword and some crudely drawn pictures that will pass as 'comics'. Peace